On Being a Mother(from her son)

[Murph]

Sylvia, LDYSLY, sent this to me and it is too good not to share it with you. I put it here for us to meditate on...seemed the right place for it to go.

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BEING A MOTHER (from her son)

After 21 years of marriage, my wife wanted me to
take another woman out to dinner and a movie. She
said, "I love you, but I know this other woman loves
you and would love to spend some time with you."

The other woman that my wife wanted me to visit
was my MOTHER, who has been a widow for 19 years,
but the demands of my work and my three children had
made it possible to visit her only occasionally.

That night I called to invite her to go out for
dinner and a movie.

"What's wrong, are you well," she asked?

My mother is the type of woman who suspects that
a late night call or a surprise invitation is a sign
of bad news.

"I thought that it would be pleasant to spend
some time with you," I responded. "Just the two of us."

She thought about it for a moment, and then
said, "I would like that very much."

That Friday after work, as I drove over to pick
her up I was a bit nervous. When I arrived at her
house, I noticed that she, too, seemed to be nervous
about our date. She waited in the door with her coat
on. She had curled her hair and was wearing the
dress that she had worn to celebrate her last wedding
anniversary.

She smiled from a face that was as radiant as an
angel's. "I told my friends that I was going to go
out with my son, and they were impressed," she said, as
she got into the car. "They can't wait to hear about
our meeting."

We went to a restaurant that, although not
elegant, was very nice and cozy. My mother took my
arm as if she were the First Lady. After we sat down, I
had to read the menu. Her eyes could only read large
print. Half way through the entries, I lifted my
eyes and saw Mom sitting there staring at me. A nostalgic
smile was on her lips. "It was I who used to have to
read the menu when you were small," she said. "Then
it's time that you relax and let me return the
favor," I responded.

[Murph]

During the dinner, we had an agreeable
conversation- -nothing extraordinary but catching up
on recent events of each other's life. We talked so
much that we missed the movie.

As we arrived at her house later, she said,
"I'll go out with you again, but only if you let me invite
you." I agreed.

"How was your dinner date?" asked my wife when I
got home. "Very nice. Much more so than I could have
imagined," I answered.

A few days later, my mother died of a massive
heart attack. It happened so suddenly that I didn't
have a chance to do anything for her.

Some time later, I received an envelope with a
copy of a restaurant receipt from the same place
mother and I had dined. An attached note said: "I
paid this bill in advance. I wasn't sure that I could be
there; but nevertheless, I paid for two plates - one
for you and the other for your wife. You will never
know what that night meant for me. I love you, son."

At that moment, I understood the importance of
saying in time: "I LOVE YOU" and to give our loved
ones the time that they deserve. Nothing in life is
more important than your family. Give them the time
they deserve, because these things cannot be put off
till "some other time."

[Murph]

Somebody said it takes about six weeks to get
back to normal after you've had a baby.... somebody
doesn't know that once you're a mother, "normal" is history.

Somebody said you learn how to be a mother by
instinct .... somebody never took a three-year-old
shopping.

Somebody said being a mother is boring .somebody
never rode in a car driven by a teenager with a
driver's permit. Somebody said if you're a "good"
mother, your child will "turn out good"....somebody
thinks a child comes with directions and a
guarantee.

Somebody said "good" mothers never raise their
voices . somebody never came out the back door just
in time to see her child hit a golf ball through the
neighbor's kitchen window.

Somebody said you don't need an education to be
a mother.... somebody never helped a fourth grader
with his math.

Somebody said you can't love the second child as
much as you love the first .... somebody doesn't
have two children.

Somebody said a mother can find all the answers
to her child-rearing questions in the books....somebody
never had a child stuff beans up his nose or in his
ears.

Somebody said the hardest part of being a mother
is labor and delivery....somebody never watched her
"baby" get on the bus for the first day of
kindergarten .... or on a plane headed for military
"boot camp."

Somebody said a mother can do her job with her
eyes closed and one hand tied behind her back
...somebody never organized seven giggling Brownies
to sell cookies.

Somebody said a mother can stop worrying after
her child gets married....somebody doesn't know that
marriage adds a new son or daughter-in-law to a
mother's heartstrings.

Somebody said a mother's job is done when her
last child leaves home....somebody never had
grandchildren.

Somebody said your mother knows you love her, so
you don't need to tell her.... somebody isn't a
mother.

[Murph]

This isn't just about being a mother; it's about appreciating the
people in your life while you have them....no matter
who that person is...

"People will forget what you said, people will
forget what you did, but people will never forget
how you made them feel."

[Keith]

My Mom and Grandfather said it was too late for them, so my Grandmother and I stayed up late together and watched Neil Armstrong take the first step on the moon in 1969. She went Home a couple of years ago, but of that night, I'll never forget the wonder in her eyes...

I was having my morning coffee with Mom and Grandma when we watched two jet aircraft crash into the World Trade Center. As the towers came down, and the dust rolled through the streets of New York as if it were alive, I'll never forget the sorrow in their eyes...

I'm fortunate to have my Mother live in the same town as I. After Nita heads to work, I try to have coffee with Mom every morning, watch the headlines and discuss the day's coming events. It's been our ritual for the past several years. Each morning when I leave Mom, I always tell her I love her. I never forget the sparkle in her eyes.

[Murph]

I bet they sparkle...like mine do when my boy tells me he loves me...

my boy is now 40 years old.

don't know how that happened...Duck's not old enough to have a 40 year old son...

or a 3 and one half (1/2 very important so don't leave it out, that's what Becks says) year old grandaughter who hits my front door hollerin', "Grams! Let's make olive oil brownies."

olive oil brownies...long story...but very funny... ;D

[Keith]

duck said:

my boy is now 40 years old.

don't know how that happened...Duck's not old enough to have a 40 year old son...

Odd, my Mom said the same thing when I turned 50 last November... ;D

duck said:

olive oil brownies...long story...but very funny... ;D

I feel a story comin' on!

[Murph]

might be a story comin'

soon as I can slow down enought to sit down and tell it...

Been on call...aaaaaaal week. Go off tomorrow morning at 8:00am
;D

[Keith]

Not to wish your life away, but I hope your evening goes really quick...

[Murph]

I am just hoping for quietly...shhhhh!

no bells, no beeps, no rings...